theprodigaldoctor: (gnaw the cheek)
[personal profile] theprodigaldoctor
Normally, when he and Obi-Wan are finished for the night, Chase has a tendency to excuse himself before too much exploration can happen. Not that he's ashamed, because he's not. He's definitely in decent shape, but maybe because he's not ready for things to be serious on that level yet. Tonight is a reminder of why and as he rolls over, trying to catch an hour of sleep before he leaves, he can't find any kind of peace because his wound is aching and the scar is itching the way it tends to do right before it rains. Rather than leave, though, he sneaks into Obi-Wan's bathroom and shifts up his t-shirt to look at the wound.

He prods and pokes at it, grimacing when the ugly scar reminds him of how close he'd come to dying.

Now, it's just a reminder of how far he is from living. He still hasn't really gone back to work and still hasn't decided whether he's going to stay on his sabbatical and inevitably quit. House would say he can't just waste his time surfing, but the hospital doesn't feel the same since the stabbing.

Wincing, he glances over his shoulder and thinks it's probably time to head back to his own room. He creeps back into the bedroom once the light is off, trying hard not to disturb Obi-Wan, even though he knows that's a difficult thing to avoid.

Date: 2015-07-12 01:47 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"You know I'm awake, don't you." Obi-Wan said it mildly, not wanting to put Chase on the spot. He was certainly fine with the current arrangement (more than fine, truth be told) and honestly, it was so far from even remotely breaking his vows that he thought he could stand a little more togetherness where Chase was concerned.

"It takes lighter feet than yours to sneak past a Jedi."

Date: 2015-07-12 02:21 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"Already awake. The Force, remember?" Obi-Wan said, tapping his temple lightly. "I don't normally use it for ill purposes, or anything, but when I'm with someone, I can usually get a sense of their comings and goings and emotions, surface things. So I knew you were getting up. I can block out a bit better when I'm actively thinking about it."

He reached his hand out and trailed it lightly along his back. "You could stay, you know. I don't mind it."

Date: 2015-07-12 07:06 pm (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope

"So we'll be awake," Obi-Wan said, shrugging a little. "All I'm saying is that you don't have to sneak out of my bed in the middle of the night. If you want to stay over, you can stay over. I would like it if you did."

Date: 2015-07-18 04:54 am (UTC)
only_hope: (beard; looking away)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"I have no other current interests but if you do, you're free to pursue them," Obi-Wan said. "Jedi...are not meant to have attachment, even if we might want it. My order might not exist any longer but that does not mean that I can't still keep to the tenets of my beliefs."

He tipped his head a bit, interrogative. "I also would not be opposed to breaking my vows. It depends on what you want."

Date: 2015-07-19 09:03 pm (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope

"If I should choose to want one long-term partner with commitment, it would be against my Order," Obi-Wan explained.

"And it is hard to break that which has been a constant in your life for so long. Though, to be honest, I have never had a desire to break my vow until recently. Perhaps it is the dissolution of the Order itself...or perhaps it is the partner."

Date: 2015-07-25 06:52 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope

"My Order no longer exists," Obi-Wan said gently. "And I feel no guilt or pain about being with you and wanting to have something more than just sex." He cupped Chase's shoulder, squeezing it lightly.

"I got my master killed. I made a mistake, I wasn't fast enough...I watched him die. I carried that guilt with me for a long time but at a certain point you eventually have to let it go. It takes longer for some than others, every situation is different...I only mean to say that I do not want you to carry guilt where I'm concerned."

Date: 2015-07-26 01:46 am (UTC)
only_hope: (beard; smile)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"I'm a Jedi, remember? I can steel my mind against more than a pretty face and a nice set of hands," Obi-Wan said, drawing his fingers through his hair. It would take more than a relationship to alter the core of him and while Anakin had fallen due to love it was because he put that love above all else - and the preservation of that love above the wishes of his beloved. It was fear and anger that drove Anakin to the Dark Side, not the love of Padme.

"Please stay? You don't have to run out every night. You can stay, if you want."

Date: 2015-07-27 01:42 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope

"I'd make it myself if we had the facilities. As it is, I'll buy," Obi-Wan said, sliding his arms around him. "Is this the first time you've ever had anything permanent with a man? Is that the reticence I sense from you or is it something else?"

Obi-Wan tried not to pry overly much with his gifts considering it put him at an unfair advantage to Chase and that was hardly something he wanted.

Date: 2015-08-01 05:55 am (UTC)
only_hope: (beard; close up)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"I am not looking for a marriage," Obi-Wan said after a moment. It was not something that a Jedi sought out and he'd seen how marriage had changed Anakin. It was hardly something he wanted to risk.

"I would like something a little more committed with you, though. However you want to make that happen."

Date: 2015-08-01 11:22 pm (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"Sharing the same bed more nights than not? Spending time together that isn't about sexual gratification? Simple things," Obi-Wan admitted. "If that isn't too much for you, it is something that I would like."

Obi-Wan tried his best to be relaxed and casual about this even if it was something he felt strongly about and had felt strongly about for quite some time.

Date: 2015-08-03 01:54 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"An excellent step," Obi-Wan agreed. "Who knows, we might even manage to give each other nicknames, eventually."

That was said with a cheeky grin because while Obi-Wan could be serious he often had to temper it with sarcasm.

Date: 2015-08-08 06:24 pm (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
Obi-Wan laughed and shook his head. "No, but Obi-Wan is kind of formal for every day use. It reminds me of being back in the temple teaching or something."

He thought for a moment and laced his fingers with Chase's, wanting to be close for a moment. "Ben is all right, though. I think I introduced myself as Ben the first time, didn't I?"

Date: 2015-08-09 06:10 pm (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"Only if you don't mind it," Obi-Wan said quietly, watching him carefully to try and get his reaction to it. Was it something just to offer because he had offered Ben? Or was it sincere. He could probe, clearly, but he did not want to; it would erase the trust between them.

"Rob, then."

Date: 2015-08-10 12:45 am (UTC)
only_hope: (Default)
From: [personal profile] only_hope
"I'd like that," Obi-Wan said warmly. He tried to keep that acceptance simple, nothing with too much pressure. It was a departure from his vows, to some extent but it also seemed to be a departure for Chase as well. It was new to them both and new things were inherently frightening.

"We'll take it one step at a time, Rob. All right?"